Archive for September, 2012

Animals Make Me Nutz

Posted in Random Stuff with tags , , , , , , , , on September 25, 2012 by Dustin
I will pee on your couch

Venus The Wonder Poodle

I love animals. I love my animals. I have three cats and a dog (toy poodle, so basically four cats). But they also make me nutz. The dog pees all over the place. No matter how much we try to train her and give her treats for going outside she will still hop on the couch every now and then and let go the bladder from hell. The cats can’t make up their mind what is going on. The orange and white one is oblivious to anything but petting, the gray and white one walks around the house crying all day and night and attacking the other animals, and the kitten is tearing up all the furniture and our skin and beating up on the dog. But theey’re so fluffy and cuddly you might say, does that make up for all this?

I don’t know if it does or not. I seem to be more frustrated with them lately than usual. Maybe since I turned 40 I have less tolerance for their bullshit. Maybe the kitten added a new dynamic that is driving the other three insane. Who knows but they better get their shit together or they’re all going to be outside animals soon.

If you can sympathize leave your crazy pet stories in the comment section below.

I want to lick your salty body

Tongue Of Sand

Working With Others

Posted in Random Stuff with tags , , , , , , on September 17, 2012 by Dustin

My wife was laid off this week from her job and we’re taking this opportunity to find her something she loves to do rather than a job she has to do. I began by helping her go through a book called I Could Do Anything If I Only I Knew What It Was  by Barbara Sher. This book examines the “What” if you’re having issues nailing down your life dreams. It helps you get passed the guessing game and into action and I hope that my wife can find something that she loves to do.

I Could Do Anything

I Could Do Anything If I Knew What It Was – By Barbara Sher

Working with someone is a challenge, especially when the goal is so unclear. I found myself feeling upset that we couldn’t find the finish line. I guess it’s my manly “Fix It” nature wanting to be rewarded for being such an awesome help, but also I felt like I was letting her down because over a weekend I wasn’t able to help her find that one true calling when she hasn’t yet found it in her 40 years on this earth. What an ego maniac I am. She was very grateful for the help I did give her and while she slept the answer came without my input. She is working on the plan and will fill me in when she is ready.

Working with anyone is always a challenge. Whether its creating something together, or working on a project, or just cooking a meal in the same kitchen. There has to be give and take. Once the take or the give is over compensated for in either direction feelings can get hurt and the relationship, even the brief one in that kitchen, can begin to break down. I have to remember when I’m helping someone that I need to keep their goals and their needs in the forefront. When I insert how I see it, or what I need into the interactions things get squirrely. I am there to provide the input that helps move the other person along. When I insert selfish motives into my actions things get distorted and I am no longer being of maximum use to the other party.

Hopefully my wife’s time on unemployment yields some breakthroughs and she finds the path towards a new job or better yet and adventure that has the byproduct of giving her fulfillment and a small amount of compensation to boot. Whatever happens I am there for her to help her along.

Bagel Mistake In The Break Room

Posted in Random Stuff with tags , , , , , , , on September 13, 2012 by Dustin

I usually don’t rant too much, well at least not on this blog, but this morning I witnessed something so bizarre and unexplainably dumb that I had to share. Bare with me while I get this out.

I am in training this week. Every dayI have a ritual. I get to the training facility and clean out my cup, get a coffee and a bagel, and head to class. Everyday there is a bagel in the tray that is halved. Usually someone will take one half of a bagel and leave the other since they didn’t want a whole bagel. Someone has been halving the bagel that is already sliced right down the middle leaving one half top piece and one half bottom piece. Basically rendering this bagel untoastable, which is annoying but I get around it and use another whole bagel instead. Really this is a first world problem and I don’t care. (I can’t eat seeds due to some intestinal issues, so if there are no bagels left without seeds then I do get a little upset.) This morning I saw the lady who has been cutting bagels in half.

I had assumed who ever was messing up bagels was eating them cold, but today I came in to the break room and found a lady fishing bagel pieces out of the toaster. She had cut the bagel then stuck the pieces into the toaster where they were hard to get out, WTH?! So I am looking at this thinking, “What a dumb ass.” Then she goes to put cream cheese on it… with a spoon. She couldn’t find a knife, which I found in two seconds, so she used a spoon. She didn’t use the handle of the spoon which is similar enough to a knife, she used the spoon to scoop the cheese out and then tried to spread it around. I offered her the knife I found and she says, “Oh that’s ok, I’m almost done anyway.” Yeah might as well finish up the round trip of your stupidity.

Broken Bagel

WTH? Noooo!

After typing this up it does seem petty to be upset about this, which really I’m not but I do think it was peculiar. It does scare me that this person is training to work on computers at the school in my area. Good thing I don’t need to have someone else work on my machines, I may get the bagel genius.

Community Drawing, Notes To The Public, and More

Posted in Artistic Stuffs, Stuff With My Kid, Writer's Blox with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2012 by Dustin

I did a lot this weekend creatively. By the time Sunday football came around I was pretty worn out. It didn’t help that I spent most of Saturday in 100 degrees fixing sprinklers and making multiple trips to the hardware store. This post is going to be picture heavy so I hope you enjoy.

Community Drawing – My First Piece

First thing we did this weekend was Friday at Perma Dirty in Claremont CA. I brought my nephew, daughter, and wife and we joined in the community draw which is going on for the next couple months. All the walls are covered in paper and blank canvases and also some furniture. I chose the chair to start with since it was free and had nothing on it yet.

Nephew's First Drawing

Nephew’s First Drawing Of The Night

Daughter Painting On The Wall

Zoe painting on the wall

After I was done with the chair I moved around the room to admire the work others were working on and chat it up with some friends in attendance. It was pretty warm with all the people and the unusually high humidity for Southern California but we all made due. I saw one guy doing homework next to an amazing artist Cynthia Garcia while she worked diligently on her chalk portrait of the Breaking Bad main star (sorry I don’t have a pic of that).

Doing Homework Is More Interesting To This Guy

Doing Homework Is More Interesting To This Guy

I decided to put a note and an arrow to have fun with this guy. Later he added some math equation which I laughed at. I drew a few more clever doodles and then we left because we were getting tired and hot and wanted to go to bed.

Juicy Weiner

My Juicy Wiener

Nar's Wall

Narwhal’s Like Other Walls

Dunce

What a Dunce

Slender Man

My Daughter Drew Slender Man

So the next day I spent way too long working on the sprinklers but after that we went down to Pomona to participate in the Walking Gallery. The name for this month’s show was Note To Self. My wife gave me a funny idea which I capitalized on. I took a small white board and a dry erase marker and made funny signs all night to get the people walking by to either laugh or interact with me.

What Are You Looking At?

Good way to get you to look at my crotch

I changed my sign every so often after I got a few laughs. Sometimes I had to wait a little bit for people to pay attention to me. I never called out to anyone. I wanted to be as non available as possible. As if the sign wasn’t very important and if they wanted to look they could but as if it was just part of me not something I was doing. Worked out great!

Some People Laughed, Most Cringed

Some People Laughed, Most Cringed

What do you think they touched?

What do you think they touched?

I like making people laugh and I got quite a few laughs out of this piece. I may revisit this another month if I having nothing else to show since it was so much fun.

Only 1?

Only 1?

On Sunday I watched some football and then went to the opening for the newest Chaffey Review literary and art journal at Simplicitea in Rancho Cucamonga. It was butt-ass hot! So many people showed up and it was good to see but with the stupid heat it was hard to do much but drink tea until I exploded. I have a short story in the latest volume, volume 8, which is my first published short story The Last Words Of Tim Dawson. You can buy a copy by sending them a check. All the details are on the website: http://www.chaffeyreview.org/.

Chaffey Review Volume 8

Chaffey Review Volume 8

Pretty busy weekend. Hopefully next month I can finally get the “Big Project” done that I have all these parts for but haven’t spent any time building. I’ll keep you updated. Hope everyone enjoyed the pictures. Let me know in the comments below or on my Facebook page what you thought!

Greener Grass Than Mine

Posted in Artistic Stuffs, Writer's Blox with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 4, 2012 by Dustin

Let Your Dogs Run Wild

Anytime I travel to a new town the grass seems to be exceptionally greener on their side. The food is in walking distance and is amazing with 400 thousand options. Kitschy neighborhoods with quaint little shops selling all kinds of frivolity abound and I wonder what the hell is wrong with me? Why do I stay living in such a mundane vanilla town with abso-freaking-lutely nothing but track homes and corporate businesses sucking the life blood out my creative soul? I’ve been to a few cities and not all of them give me such vehement reactions to my own home town but too damn many have and I’m really wondering when am I going to start planning my escape?

I have made the best of living here in suburbia, about 50 miles east of LA in the mecca of the Walmart culture. I run multiple video sites on youtube, do performance art on the street once a month, write blogs and stories and poetry, and once a year I fill my garage with horrific scenes of blood and gore and invite the neighbors to walk through and get some candy.  It’s all very fun and I love the people I hang with for all these events, but the lack of anything happening on it’s own, especially restaurant wise, is killing me.

I visited Portland Oregon this weekend as a birthday present to my wife. Albeit this is the Vegan/Vegetarian stomping ground for a shit ton of hippy types, it is still a good example of city life breeding creativity not only in culinary amazing sauce, but also in art. (I am fairly biased being that I am a vegetarian freak myself.) We walked to the local once a year art happening “Art in the Pearl” and met lots of fun people from all over that are doing things and making it happen. The last time I saw anything related to art in my little dumpy town was when the guy with the white van set out all his paint by number pieces in front of Ralph’s to be sold to people who needed something to fill some space above the mantle and wouldn’t know art if it shit in their Twinkie.

My wife and I have gone back and forth and we’re pretty sure we like northern California for our eventual landing spot but for now we’re braving the 110 average heat index during the summer and a terrible food selection so that our daughter can finish high school with her friends. Come next year we may just be searching for a new place in the bay area. Until then we make the most of what we got.

Where do you think the grass is greener?

The Benson Hotel – Portland Oregon

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